I haven't posted much this week, mostly because things have been running really quite smoothly. Amy had a treatment this morning, and when the Good Doc asked me how things have been going, I realized that I can't remember a single temper tantrum since Monday. So really, all week she has been pleasant, compliant, and calm.
He also asked what other differences I have noticed, and overall I could only say that she seems calmer. Her hyper "I'm so excited!!" mode has not been overwhelming, as it can be at times. When he asked Amy how she was feeling, she clammed up, though, and wouldn't talk. I really wish she would let me in on how she is feeling! Her behavior seems to be reflecting a much calmer inner attitude.
The temper tantrum on Monday was a result of a homework problem. This year in social studies she has to read a passage and then answer questions about what she read. Particularly, she has to answer "Critical Thinking" questions, where the answer isn't explicitly laid out in the reading.
Ha! The question she struggled with was, "Why do you think a person has to be 18 years old to vote?" Since she had no idea, she panicked, and no amount of talking her through a thought process was helping. Her only thought was "12 and 15 year olds can understand politics, so they should be allowed to vote!"
After screaming and rolling on the floor for about 1/2 an hour, she finally decided to write something down.
I can't wait for the next assignment!!
Friday, August 31, 2012
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Ups and Downs
We had a busy weekend, so it was an interesting experiment to see how Amy did. Overall, she is really progressing. When comparing this weekend to last weekend (remember the soccer game? Oy.), we are in a much better place. I keep finding myself shocked at little things she does, like compliment my hair, or help Gwyn with a project, or cooperate when I ask her to help out. She's even given some spontaneous kisses and hugs. Weird, I didn't really notice that she didn't do that often until she started to.
She's becoming fun to be around!
We did have a few incidents this weekend that weren't so good. She flew into a rage with her dad (who really wants his own pseudonym, so I'm going to call him Mike). I didn't quite catch what it was about, but she wound up in her room for a while. There have been some whiney times and defiant times, but almost all of them are resolved rather quickly. It's like she realizes it's immature halfway through.
Church has been a pretty squirmy place for Amy, historically. At our church, children sit through the service with the adults, and then go to Sunday School. Usually, by the end of the service, our pew is littered with crayons, bulletins, a doll, and a pen or two. She usually shifts from one end to the other end, takes a bathroom break halfway through, squirms on someone's lap for a while, and is generally very fidgety. Today, she wasn't slumping, lying down, squirming or restless. She just sat there. She followed along with the bulletin, and did the "Children's Activities". She was present in church, not just there, if that makes sense. That was pretty awesome. And I didn't feel like I had to do a clean sweep of our entire pew at the end...
This week we only have two NFB sessions. I have noticed that the further we get from the last one, the more her behavior deteriorates. That is supposed to get better as time goes on.
I think everyone around here has been feeling a lot of stress begin to melt away. Except maybe Gwyn who hasn't recognized the changes yet. She still gets angry at Amy quickly, because that is the way they have been interacting for forever... I need to have a little talk with her tomorrow, probably.
Overall, Yippee yay yay!!!
She's becoming fun to be around!
We did have a few incidents this weekend that weren't so good. She flew into a rage with her dad (who really wants his own pseudonym, so I'm going to call him Mike). I didn't quite catch what it was about, but she wound up in her room for a while. There have been some whiney times and defiant times, but almost all of them are resolved rather quickly. It's like she realizes it's immature halfway through.
Church has been a pretty squirmy place for Amy, historically. At our church, children sit through the service with the adults, and then go to Sunday School. Usually, by the end of the service, our pew is littered with crayons, bulletins, a doll, and a pen or two. She usually shifts from one end to the other end, takes a bathroom break halfway through, squirms on someone's lap for a while, and is generally very fidgety. Today, she wasn't slumping, lying down, squirming or restless. She just sat there. She followed along with the bulletin, and did the "Children's Activities". She was present in church, not just there, if that makes sense. That was pretty awesome. And I didn't feel like I had to do a clean sweep of our entire pew at the end...
This week we only have two NFB sessions. I have noticed that the further we get from the last one, the more her behavior deteriorates. That is supposed to get better as time goes on.
I think everyone around here has been feeling a lot of stress begin to melt away. Except maybe Gwyn who hasn't recognized the changes yet. She still gets angry at Amy quickly, because that is the way they have been interacting for forever... I need to have a little talk with her tomorrow, probably.
Overall, Yippee yay yay!!!
Friday, August 24, 2012
Getting There
Amy has been kind of funny the past two days or so. She keeps flip flopping between "old" behaviors and "new" behaviors.
She went to her appointment without fuss yesterday morning (even though she was late for school). She didn't want to get to her chair, and has to be cajoled every time, but the Good Doc pointed out that she needs time to warm up a bit. He was very patient. (Me, not so much, but I'm learning!)
Amy kept asking about how late to school she would be. I kept reassuring her that it would only be an hour, and that we have gotten the ok from her teacher, and that it will be ok. No panic fits, just repeated concern. As we were driving away she realized that she left her library book in the doctor's office. She got very upset, but calmed down pretty quickly.
She just seems to be developing a better perspective on problems. Hooray!
After school she came home and crashed on the couch as usual. We drove to the Noodle place, because I wanted to see how she would do at a restaurant, and because her dad just got back from being out of town for a few days.
And because I didn't feel like cooking...
Anyway, she screamed at Gwyn and Micah for being too loud in the car. She kept saying she was trying to take a nap and that she was really tired. Very grumpy.
Once we got some food in her, though, she cheered up and was <mostly> pleasant the rest of the night. She did her homework quickly and then she and Gwyn decided to play "Dance Class" and she taught Gwyn and Milo the grapevine step. They weren't too happy with her bossiness, but from what I can hear, Amy was behaving gently towards them (even if she was being bossy).
She's trying!
She went to her appointment without fuss yesterday morning (even though she was late for school). She didn't want to get to her chair, and has to be cajoled every time, but the Good Doc pointed out that she needs time to warm up a bit. He was very patient. (Me, not so much, but I'm learning!)
Amy kept asking about how late to school she would be. I kept reassuring her that it would only be an hour, and that we have gotten the ok from her teacher, and that it will be ok. No panic fits, just repeated concern. As we were driving away she realized that she left her library book in the doctor's office. She got very upset, but calmed down pretty quickly.
She just seems to be developing a better perspective on problems. Hooray!
After school she came home and crashed on the couch as usual. We drove to the Noodle place, because I wanted to see how she would do at a restaurant, and because her dad just got back from being out of town for a few days.
And because I didn't feel like cooking...
Anyway, she screamed at Gwyn and Micah for being too loud in the car. She kept saying she was trying to take a nap and that she was really tired. Very grumpy.
Once we got some food in her, though, she cheered up and was <mostly> pleasant the rest of the night. She did her homework quickly and then she and Gwyn decided to play "Dance Class" and she taught Gwyn and Milo the grapevine step. They weren't too happy with her bossiness, but from what I can hear, Amy was behaving gently towards them (even if she was being bossy).
She's trying!
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Spaghetti
A few really good things today, after a rocky start.
Mornings are icky. I'm not a morning person. None of my kids are morning people. Yuck. This morning I have to get kids out the door by 8:15. Micah is up by 7:00, begging me to play "Super Mario Galaxy" so he can watch. Sorry bud, that's not happening!
I'm still trying to get the girls out of bed at 7:45. Gwyn is having an especially hard time this morning and keeps yelling at anybody who comes too close, not getting dressed, not eating breakfast, yadda, yadda, yadda. Mornings are prime scream time for Amy, and she kept sneaking back to bed after being dragged out. Nobody was happy this morning when the bus showed up, but the girls managed to get off to school, and Micah finally talked me into playing "Super Mario Galaxy".
After school was MUCH better, however, and we had a number of good things happen this evening.
1) Amy's third NFB treatment went smoothly. She doesn't like the gel they use to stick the sensors to her scalp, and at first refused to cooperate. Her defiance wasn't the same tearful, angry stubbornness that we have seen, however. It was more of a playful, "I dare you to make me" type of attitude. Still not really great, but not bad either. She sat through the session and did really well.
2) I told her as we were leaving that tomorrow we had to come back for a morning appointment, so she would be late to school. She does NOT like this plan. One of her big anxieties is getting behind at school, so to miss is embarrassing and problematic. She threw a temper tantrum in the car that lasted...
...until we got out of the parking lot. That's it! No 30 minute screaming fit! I was shocked.
3) Afterwards, we went to Gram's (God bless Gram) for spaghetti. She watched over her 1 year old cousin responsibly, was in a good mood, ATE all of her spaghetti without complaint, and when I asked her to pick up the toys so we could leave, she didn't throw a fit. She just...did it.
4) On our way home, Gwyn was singing in the backseat while Amy was trying to read. This usually sparks major problems. There have been many times I've had to pull over to let everyone in the car cool down, because I couldn't drive safely with all the fighting in the car. Today, Amy asked Gwyn to please be quiet. When Gwyn continued to sing, for the most part, Amy IGNORED HER. This was also shocking. I could tell by a few squirmy sounds coming from the back that she was annoyed, but she didn't scream or panic. She just dealt with it.
5) Finally, since hubs is out of town for a few days, I had to help with homework at the same time Micah had to go to bed. Gwyn is learning some first grade spelling words, and we were having such a pleasant night, I thought, "Why not?". I asked Amy to please help Gwyn with her homework. She said, "Sure!" and when I checked on them a little while later, Amy was in full blown teacher mode, working patiently with Gwyn and helping her write her letters the right way. Neither of them were frustrated.
So -- good day!
Here's the insanity:
I called the Good Doc's office today to get all 17 of Amy's remaining treatments on the calendar. I thought we might have a few weeks of during school appointments, followed by mostly after school sessions. Nope. Every single opening they had available until mid-October is during the school day. Her teachers are going to LOVE me. Yikes.
Mornings are icky. I'm not a morning person. None of my kids are morning people. Yuck. This morning I have to get kids out the door by 8:15. Micah is up by 7:00, begging me to play "Super Mario Galaxy" so he can watch. Sorry bud, that's not happening!
I'm still trying to get the girls out of bed at 7:45. Gwyn is having an especially hard time this morning and keeps yelling at anybody who comes too close, not getting dressed, not eating breakfast, yadda, yadda, yadda. Mornings are prime scream time for Amy, and she kept sneaking back to bed after being dragged out. Nobody was happy this morning when the bus showed up, but the girls managed to get off to school, and Micah finally talked me into playing "Super Mario Galaxy".
After school was MUCH better, however, and we had a number of good things happen this evening.
1) Amy's third NFB treatment went smoothly. She doesn't like the gel they use to stick the sensors to her scalp, and at first refused to cooperate. Her defiance wasn't the same tearful, angry stubbornness that we have seen, however. It was more of a playful, "I dare you to make me" type of attitude. Still not really great, but not bad either. She sat through the session and did really well.
2) I told her as we were leaving that tomorrow we had to come back for a morning appointment, so she would be late to school. She does NOT like this plan. One of her big anxieties is getting behind at school, so to miss is embarrassing and problematic. She threw a temper tantrum in the car that lasted...
...until we got out of the parking lot. That's it! No 30 minute screaming fit! I was shocked.
3) Afterwards, we went to Gram's (God bless Gram) for spaghetti. She watched over her 1 year old cousin responsibly, was in a good mood, ATE all of her spaghetti without complaint, and when I asked her to pick up the toys so we could leave, she didn't throw a fit. She just...did it.
4) On our way home, Gwyn was singing in the backseat while Amy was trying to read. This usually sparks major problems. There have been many times I've had to pull over to let everyone in the car cool down, because I couldn't drive safely with all the fighting in the car. Today, Amy asked Gwyn to please be quiet. When Gwyn continued to sing, for the most part, Amy IGNORED HER. This was also shocking. I could tell by a few squirmy sounds coming from the back that she was annoyed, but she didn't scream or panic. She just dealt with it.
5) Finally, since hubs is out of town for a few days, I had to help with homework at the same time Micah had to go to bed. Gwyn is learning some first grade spelling words, and we were having such a pleasant night, I thought, "Why not?". I asked Amy to please help Gwyn with her homework. She said, "Sure!" and when I checked on them a little while later, Amy was in full blown teacher mode, working patiently with Gwyn and helping her write her letters the right way. Neither of them were frustrated.
So -- good day!
Here's the insanity:
I called the Good Doc's office today to get all 17 of Amy's remaining treatments on the calendar. I thought we might have a few weeks of during school appointments, followed by mostly after school sessions. Nope. Every single opening they had available until mid-October is during the school day. Her teachers are going to LOVE me. Yikes.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Good Mood
Wow, Amy was in a good mood today. I picked her up from school and she came bouncing out talking about her chorus audition, she cooperatively went along to drop the other two at Gram's (God bless Gram) house. She was pleasant with our Good Doc and spoke about the kind of treatment she wanted. She went to her piano lesson without complaint.
Car rides are usually a pain in the rear end around here. They are prime times for sibling fights. Amy loves to kick the seat or pull on the seatbelt in front of her. All three try to talk and interrupt at the same time.
Today, for whatever reason, all three behaved beautifully in the car. They even sang a song together without fighting. After Amy's treatment, we went to dinner and they didn't whine. They laughed and talked like normal people.
So nice.
Today, Amy asked if she could play the video game style of NFB instead of watching the movie. She got to race helium balloons and cats against each other. The first time she tried, she came in last place, but the second time (and with a few adjustments by the Good Doc, I imagine) she won! She was really tickled, and it was hard for her to calm down enough to play the game again, but she pretty quickly got into the groove of it, and began winning most of her rounds. Towards the end she started to get a little squirmy, and her mood suddenly shifted. She didn't say anything, but you could tell she was ready to go. After she finished her last one, she jumped up and said, "I have to go to the bathroom!"
So that explains that.
Amy realized tonight at homework time that she had left her math book at school. Because we left early, she didn't think to grab it. This caused a short-lived panic that I was able to talk her out of by saying she could 1) do it first thing tomorrow morning when she got to school and 2) that I would e-mail her math teacher to let her know. A similar experience a year ago caused many many many tears.
Tomorrow is treatment number 3. So far so good!
Car rides are usually a pain in the rear end around here. They are prime times for sibling fights. Amy loves to kick the seat or pull on the seatbelt in front of her. All three try to talk and interrupt at the same time.
Today, for whatever reason, all three behaved beautifully in the car. They even sang a song together without fighting. After Amy's treatment, we went to dinner and they didn't whine. They laughed and talked like normal people.
So nice.
Today, Amy asked if she could play the video game style of NFB instead of watching the movie. She got to race helium balloons and cats against each other. The first time she tried, she came in last place, but the second time (and with a few adjustments by the Good Doc, I imagine) she won! She was really tickled, and it was hard for her to calm down enough to play the game again, but she pretty quickly got into the groove of it, and began winning most of her rounds. Towards the end she started to get a little squirmy, and her mood suddenly shifted. She didn't say anything, but you could tell she was ready to go. After she finished her last one, she jumped up and said, "I have to go to the bathroom!"
So that explains that.
Amy realized tonight at homework time that she had left her math book at school. Because we left early, she didn't think to grab it. This caused a short-lived panic that I was able to talk her out of by saying she could 1) do it first thing tomorrow morning when she got to school and 2) that I would e-mail her math teacher to let her know. A similar experience a year ago caused many many many tears.
Tomorrow is treatment number 3. So far so good!
Pride
Yesterday, Amy asked if I would like to play her piano song with her (there is a duet part for teacher). Would I??? Well, sure!!
Amy played through the song with me, and I said, "Wow! I'm so proud of you!"
This really rubbed her the wrong way. She started screaming and crying, "I don't want you to be proud! I don't like it when people are proud of me!"
Umm, what? Why not?
"When you are proud that gives me a weird feeling in my belly, and I don't like it!!!"
Not sure what to do with that one!
Her second NFB treatment is this afternoon...
Amy played through the song with me, and I said, "Wow! I'm so proud of you!"
This really rubbed her the wrong way. She started screaming and crying, "I don't want you to be proud! I don't like it when people are proud of me!"
Umm, what? Why not?
"When you are proud that gives me a weird feeling in my belly, and I don't like it!!!"
Not sure what to do with that one!
Her second NFB treatment is this afternoon...
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Baby Steps
Amy really loves music. So do I! I'm an early-childhood music teacher, so it's very important to me that my children are surrounded by a wide variety of music, and that they have the opportunity to learn an instrument.
We started Amy on violin when she was five, because she was begging, and because we thought it might be a good thing for her. She immediately clammed up, hated practicing, and had a miserable time of it. I was bummed, because she was actually pretty good! She has a great ear and took to the fingerings naturally and easily.
She said the worst part of violin for her was that she had to stand up straight to practice. My thoughts then were, "Big deal, kid! So you stand up -- it's not that bad!". Now I see her Sensory Integration problems probably had something to do with that.
Anyway, we let her quit violin, and she took a general music class with me. I was reluctant, because in the past when I am "teacher" it doesn't go over well.
This was no exception. She seemed to enjoy the class, but she was always wanting to sit on my lap, or lead the direction of activities. In fairness to all my (paying) students, I had to take her out.
About 8 months ago, we put her in private piano lessons. She gets to sit down! She has visual cues in the music and on the keyboard! All good things for her. Her teacher is a lovely lady who is calm and knowledgeable.
All started well. She was enthusiastic about playing the pieces she learned, she did her theory homework without complaint and she seemed to like her teacher and her lessons. Again, she's very good at music, so this all came quite naturally and easily for her.
Then, she had to learn a piece of music that took more than one easy run through to get right. I sat with her at the piano to show her how to play two notes at the same time, and she immediately WIGGED OUT. I tried to calmly and carefully show her how to take it slowly, one hand at a time, and she will get it. Half an hour later, she was still screaming about how she could never do it and it's IMPOSSIBLE!!!
This is pretty typical for Amy. As soon as something gets hard, she panics. As we started counseling a few months ago, I spoke to her piano teacher about lowering her expectations temporarily, and perhaps including some improvisation activities or composition exercises into her lesson. She was agreeable, and Amy has been enjoying the new focus to her lesson.
Here's the baby step:
Yesterday, I encouraged Amy to practice her new song her teacher gave her. I was worried, because it has some chords and some finger movements she hasn't played yet. Sure enough, two notes in, the tears and screaming started. I sat with her to help, and it was the same old, same old. After 15 minutes or so, I asked her if she would like to take a break and she got a really determined look on her face, screamed, "NO!" and sat down and played those notes.
They were loud, unmusical, the rhythm was all wrong, and it was beautiful. I have never seen Amy fight to figure something out.
Today, I asked her to play her song, and she sat down and whipped right through it. Now I'm trying to decide if I should teach her the correct rhythm, or if I should leave that up to her teacher...
We started Amy on violin when she was five, because she was begging, and because we thought it might be a good thing for her. She immediately clammed up, hated practicing, and had a miserable time of it. I was bummed, because she was actually pretty good! She has a great ear and took to the fingerings naturally and easily.
She said the worst part of violin for her was that she had to stand up straight to practice. My thoughts then were, "Big deal, kid! So you stand up -- it's not that bad!". Now I see her Sensory Integration problems probably had something to do with that.
Anyway, we let her quit violin, and she took a general music class with me. I was reluctant, because in the past when I am "teacher" it doesn't go over well.
This was no exception. She seemed to enjoy the class, but she was always wanting to sit on my lap, or lead the direction of activities. In fairness to all my (paying) students, I had to take her out.
About 8 months ago, we put her in private piano lessons. She gets to sit down! She has visual cues in the music and on the keyboard! All good things for her. Her teacher is a lovely lady who is calm and knowledgeable.
All started well. She was enthusiastic about playing the pieces she learned, she did her theory homework without complaint and she seemed to like her teacher and her lessons. Again, she's very good at music, so this all came quite naturally and easily for her.
Then, she had to learn a piece of music that took more than one easy run through to get right. I sat with her at the piano to show her how to play two notes at the same time, and she immediately WIGGED OUT. I tried to calmly and carefully show her how to take it slowly, one hand at a time, and she will get it. Half an hour later, she was still screaming about how she could never do it and it's IMPOSSIBLE!!!
This is pretty typical for Amy. As soon as something gets hard, she panics. As we started counseling a few months ago, I spoke to her piano teacher about lowering her expectations temporarily, and perhaps including some improvisation activities or composition exercises into her lesson. She was agreeable, and Amy has been enjoying the new focus to her lesson.
Here's the baby step:
Yesterday, I encouraged Amy to practice her new song her teacher gave her. I was worried, because it has some chords and some finger movements she hasn't played yet. Sure enough, two notes in, the tears and screaming started. I sat with her to help, and it was the same old, same old. After 15 minutes or so, I asked her if she would like to take a break and she got a really determined look on her face, screamed, "NO!" and sat down and played those notes.
They were loud, unmusical, the rhythm was all wrong, and it was beautiful. I have never seen Amy fight to figure something out.
Today, I asked her to play her song, and she sat down and whipped right through it. Now I'm trying to decide if I should teach her the correct rhythm, or if I should leave that up to her teacher...
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